When There is No Break in Your Spring Break

Spring Break. There’s nothing like it! When you were a child, it likely meant getting a week off from school and having fun with your friends outdoors in the fresh spring air. You may have capped it off with a celebration of Easter, enjoying an Easter Egg hunt or going to church with your family wearing your new Sunday best. When you got a little older in those high school and college years, Spring Break continued to mean a much-needed break from schoolwork and a time to enjoy with friends. You might’ve also found yourself working a job during the break and even having to get in a few study sessions for your upcoming finals, but still Spring Break was a magical time of the year that felt pretty carefree. Chances are that when you finally became an adult you learned to push through without those familiar spring breaks, unless of course you are a teacher like my hubby. But then along came children and once again the excitement of having a Spring Break was reintroduced into your life. Only this time it was so much better, because you were now getting to see it all through your child’s eyes. Trips to the children’s museum and the beach, fun easter egg hunts, and more. Just like that Spring Break was beautiful and magical once again.

The truth, however, for those of us raising children with special needs, is that Spring Break is often not all that beautiful and magical.  In fact, for parents like us, Spring Break is no break at all. Instead of an Insta perfect post of our children all dressed in matching Easter outfits and beautifully posed in some picturesque field, we often struggle just to be able to find cute Easter clothes that our child can where that won’t cause a sensory issue with itchy tags and materials. Parents often find that community Easter Egg hunts are not adapted to their child’s needs and so they forgo the experience all together as it simply leads to overstimulation and subsequent meltdowns anyway. Parents also often find that they cannot even bring their own child into their places of worship due to all of the lights, noise, crowds and other stimuli that can overwhelm their child. Sadly, this often means that families miss out on this very special time of celebration. And what about all that fun free time during Spring Break?  Unfortunately the reality is that while other families are busy going to the pool and carpooling to fun activities with friends, often our families are busy going to therapies and doctors’ appointments that they’ve scheduled and waited months for. This of course often extends into adulthood. When other parents are welcoming college students’ home for some much-needed family time during the Spring break, our families are simply trying to keep their young adult on schedule with programs interrupted for the Spring Break. It’s such a trigger for grief in our families as it highlights the never-ending caregiving that our families are forced to do, and it brings up feelings of loss for the things that are not or will never be.

So, what is a parent to do when there is no break in their child’s Spring Break. Here are a few suggestions:

Get Out There:

First off don’t sit around and stay stuck in your circumstances. Go get out there. Find an accessible playground, reach out to another parent and child team, and just go. Sign up for an adaptive swim class and go meet some other families who are doing the same. Enjoy some frozen yogurt outside as you listen to your favorite music and dance in whatever way you can. Paint or dye some Easter eggs or simply enjoy hiding the plastic kind. Look up your local churches that have a Disability or Special Needs Ministry and go enjoy the Easter Service as a family. Whatever you do just get out there. The world is waiting. Take a break from all the stress of caregiving in some way and put the “break” back into your families “Spring Break.”

Enjoy the Ride:

Life has its ups and downs. Yes, this life has given us a few more downturns than other’s may experience in their parenting years, and it is quite a roller coaster, however we can still enjoy the ride. We can learn to enjoy the ride. The practice of gratitude is so powerful. Brain studies show that by finding ways to be thankful we can literally rewire our brains. We can help shift our perspective despite our circumstances and ultimately find a way to enjoy the ride. So, take a moment and count your blessings as you sit in that therapy session. Plug in your headset at that park, look around at all the beautiful spring nature that surrounds you, and find a moment to calm your mind and remember the good stuff of this life. You won’t regret it, and in fact you’ll find that you experience far more joy.

Find a Way:

Lastly whether your Spring Break has a break to it or not, find a way to get one. Take a walk with a friend, read a book, get your nails done, have a coffee with your hubby. Whatever you do simply find a way to get a little self-care in. It’s important that you take breaks for your own mental health. It will benefit you and those you care for when you do. So, find a way: schedule that respite care, recruit a friend or family, ask your spouse for some time off and then don’t forget to return the favor. You will be so much better off when you take a break as a caregiver, so don’t second guess it and simply find a way to put that break back into your Spring Break.

Parents we get it! Spring Break really doesn’t feel like a break, but we want to encourage you to find a way to put the break back into Spring Break and we know that you’ll be so thankful you did. Everyone needs a break so get out there, enjoy the ride, and find a way. You got this! And remember we’re here as a community cheering you on Mom and Dad, so reach out and connect with us!